From the pen of an occasional-hopeless-philosopher

When I was little, I was spellbound by a story by the name of "Phoolkumari" that, first my mom and later some story-book taught me. Ever since then, I have carried it in some corner of my heart — well preserved, untouched, unforgettable. I say I don't know why, but actually I do.

Come to think of it, anything that touches us, affects us, makes us feel nostalgic, somewhere carries something that we can truly and deeply relate to. It is, but, human, to feel ecstatic at the fact that someone else too feels about something exactly the way we do. Having said that, Phoolkumari's story that mom'd often narrate to me at bedtime, is what it is for me, because I have seen it come into action, too many times to ignore. For the uninitiated, the story goes something like this:

Phoolkumari was the darling daughter of a king, a pretty little princess, so cheerful that her vivacious laughter could light up the environment, spring up new flowers and what not. She liked being happy and so, didn't need a reason to be so. Everybody loved the little rajkumari for the purity of her heart and her cheerful nature.
   One day, the princess went out to the garden with her father, just for a stroll. While she was her usual self, the king wasn't. There was some major issue of the kingdom administration perturbing him and he wanted a little peace of mind to spend some time thinking, on his own. Phoolkumari, on the other hand, was loving the greenery of the place, the colorful fragrance of the flowers, the cool breeze and the chirping birds. All of a sudden something—something probably amusing—happened and Phoolkumari started laughing. She was a child, and thus couldn't gauge the tension on her father's face. She tried to share her moment of amusement with her loving father, hoping to make him happy too, but he instead ended up getting angry and shouted at her, "are you mad? Why do you always have to laugh without a reason?!"
   The king's words were such a blow to the ever-so-loved and happy princess, that she couldn't even smile again, forget about laughing. Days went by and the whole kingdom joined the king and the queen in their anxiety, over the princess's lack of response to things. They yearned for her smile, the king cursed himself inside for having been so harsh with a little girl. He made his best efforts to cheer her up again — people from all over the country were called in to entertain her, if someone could bring her smile back, he was promised a huge award.
I won't get further with the story, but in the end, one of the entertainers, a stand-up comedian, did succeed in making the princess happy again. And the whole kingdom celebrated that day.

Unfortunately, we are no kings/queens/princes/princesses. We are ordinary people and if we're not happy, we're not happy, the world doesn't give a damn. And that much is fair enough. My problem is with the people who don't let us be happy, who have to be doing something or the other that distresses us or worse, spoils the day. And believe it or not, intentionally or unintentionally, we all or almost all, make someone unhappy with our words or actions quite often. You, me, everybody. I wonder why. There is a goodie-good person residing inside all of us, that knows what might unnecessarily hit the other person adversely, yet, it don't care to think too much. We don't.

I give both thumbs-up to straight-forwardness and honesty, one shouldn't lie. Fake compliments too are best  avoided. But of late, I have started to think, how important criticism really is? Even honest criticism for that matter. If I don't look good some day, how important is it for someone to comment, "ye kya ban ke ayi hai?" or if I got a new dress that I am happy to be wearing, how wise is it for someone to play the spoiler by saying, "yahi mila tha kya?" OR say, a girl and a guy are in a supposedly serious relationship, and a happy one at that. They maybe poles apart from each other, but happy still. We, as spectators, obviously don't know the deeper nuances of their relationship. The girl maybe very short-tempered and the guy, a wise man; the girl may be hurting the guy everyday 'coz of this and the guy maybe the sweetest she could ever get, who deals with her patiently, and so on. We wouldn't get to know such things as outsiders. Then what fun do we get in comparing them both, maybe looks-wise, and casually commenting, "the girl is way too good for the guy man. Just look at him!!" We may mean no harm, but is it fair? Is it wise? Say one of them heard such things being said behind their back, how'd it feel? Would they be left totally unaffected?

I don't want to project myself as some melodramatic Phoolkumari with all this. These might sound like instances drawn from nowhere, bearing no coherence or little relevance, but I hope you know what am getting at. These aren't personal experiences, but things that still go around. Wonder why?
Maybe we could just let others be happy as they are and not poke our noses when not invited? Maybe we could keep our honesty at one side sometimes and not be outright critical/cynical about someone; it isn't that we don't commit sins greater than dishonesty anyway.

Maybe we could avoid indulging in mankind's favorite activity of describing others' faults to them. 'Coz admit it or not, the good old philosophy of "being honest" has been misinterpreted by everyone as "being unnecessary critical". Maybe we could let a person be happy if he is, and not be what the king was to the princess in that old story. Maybe. I'm not too sure. Happiness, afterall, is easier to lose and difficult to gain.

P.S: Please don't mind having spent your time reading this if this made little sense to you. But then, the title had enough to warn you in advance: 'from the pen of a "hopeless" philosopher'.

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Jagjit Singh (8.2.1941–10.10.2011)

Another demise. Of another man of brilliance extraordinaire. Isn't it strange, how people who don't even know of your existence, can cast such an inexplicable influence on your life, that their loss is shocking enough to wring your soul to tears.

 I was little, very little, when I first heard dad singing the ghazal Garaj Baras. Young, however I was, I so loved it. Heard it on several occasions from dad, and playing on one of his many cassette tapes often enough to be affected. What was strange was that, even when dad stopped listening to those cassettes after some time, the ghazal, the voice and the words, remained with me. So much so that, when I grew up and had internet access—which I didn't, till 12th standard— I looked it up one day and was just too happy to have finally found it. It's there in my phone still and I play it whenever the mood is a bit low and I feel like reflecting a little bit. I started listening to ghazals only because of the legend who is no more.

 I have seen him a lot on T.V, heard him and about him—from my parents, who'd tell me about his tragic life that witnessed the unfortunate death of his only son when he was just 21 and later, of his adopted daughter too. But he moved on, had to move on, and continued singing. It brings me to shivers, to think how hard it must have been, for him to let the musician in him to continue working, while the father in him was so broken.

 "Garaj Baras" that I talk of, isn't perhaps his most popular rendition. People's reminiscences of the legend, that are on right now, don't seem to be mentioning it; but for me, it is special and close to my heart. "Tum itna jo muskura rahe ho, kya gham hai jisko chupa rahe ho" is another one. But this is closest to me. I would suggest you to spend a little time listening to it and reflecting upon the words, if you listen to ghazal-music. If not, you might at least be able to measure the weight of the loss that the whole country is mourning.

 Some of its most moving lines:
 ...soch samajh waalon ko thodi nadaani de maula...
...jeene waalon ko marne ki asaani de maula...
...jhooton ki duniya mein sach ko, tabaani de maula...
...tere hote koi kisi ki, jaan ka dushman kyun ho...
...fir mandir ko koi meera, deewani de maula...

Here's the link:

 Won't say "R.I.P Jagjit Singh". If his soul can't rest in peace, no-one's can.

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On death, Steve Jobs and Steve Jobs' death.

On this day that the whole world mourns in unison, I can't help but contemplate over the two opposite facets of death — ironically the most inseparable part of life — as they flash in front of my eyes.


The last time so much was said and heard about someone's demise was when Osama Bin Laden — the most intimidating terrorist of all times, one whose very mention was enough to send shivers down the spine — was shot dead in what went on to be, one of the most talked-about missions ever undertaken in the history of mankind. At that time, the philosopher in me had prophesied:-Forget the basics of humanity and be staunchly 'religious' all your life. You too might die the most celebrated death ever.


On this day again, as people of the world seem wholly taken with the reminiscences of the man — Mr Steve-Apple-Jobs — the creative genius of an innovator who had the eye for an "I" that was going to change the very face of technology, and hopefully still will, the philosopher in me again wants to prophesy, for myself this time, that: if I were to die a death even a needle-point as mourned as this; if my dead soul was to be prayed for, honored and glorified even an atom's size as of the man who is no more, I'd know, sitting in heaven or hell — whatever may be the case — that mine was a life lived like none other . How I wish.


And this is not just to bask in the glory of the moment that I say all of this, I really mean it. Every word of it.
R.I.P Steve Jobs. 
Ironically, it's only now that you're dead, that the part of the youth hitherto untouched by your inspiring words, would know of the great who backs the mind of every budding entrepreneur today.  The man left a lot to learn from. For all of us.

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10 best things about girls' schools

Here are 10 things that, I suppose, make life in a girls' school rocking:

1. Life is pretty much free from double-not-so-innocent-meanings. Be it the Geography teacher's mention of a certain "rapeseed" or those Biology lessons on Reproduction, everything is what it really is. Simple humor, simple life, simple smiles. 
2. Girly talks uninhibited. For the lovelies who can't resist discussing about their nail-paints, hairstyles, latest trends and stuff, an all-girls environment works better. 'Coz when they do so in front of guys, it's the other girls who end up looking elsewhere sheepishly. #askMEaboutIT
3. No bickering, bitching and message-passing for those helpless love birds; no going to school to "see someone special"; no friendships going bad due to stupid crushes; no making friends just to be friends with some-one; no fighting for a seat near that, it's getting cliched but, some-one again. With boys and their desperate acts not around, none of this to hamper the smooth-running of regular school-life.
   It is thanks to hearsay that I know of all the cheesy stuff that commonly goes on in co-ed schools. As corny as they may sound, girls' schools are thankfully, and obviously, free of all such bullshit. 
4. You learn how to ace the impossible—how to understand girls. Though of course, only if you are a girl too. But then, as a matter of fact, girls are impossible to fully comprehend not just for the ever-so-weepy about this, guys; but girls themselves! Infact, forget about girls knowing other girls, it'd be a surprise if they can be sure about themselves even.
   How this helps? Well, god doesn't seem to have endowed any other species with as much variety as the fairer-sex. So when you get to know them inside-out, you get to know a lot about human-nature inside-out, in general—how sweet as well as bitter it can be, how selfless as well as selfish it can be, how fickle and oppositely, how focused it can be, and so on. Thus, you get to know not just two, but multifarious possible facets of you. (Some philosophy, that is, eh?)
   
5. It is fun being "un-conscious". Having people of the opposite sex around, of whatever kind, certainly induces some amount of self-consciousness and/or discomfort, for anybody for that matter. You are bound to want to watch your actions, words etc, even if they'd have been harmless otherwise.
   Not that this is some problem, but then, was being at your natural best, ever short on fun?
   
   
6. The teachers, get to be just teachers, for god sake! And not a part of some toddler's fantasies.
   I've heard of just too many guys having some liking—to say the least—for those "pretty gurus" who had the misfortune of teaching them. Liking for their smile, dressing-style, hair, laughter and so on and forth with the crap.
   This is why the idea of a girls' school brings more relief, to me at least. That doesn't mean there's no-one here taking daily note of their teachers' dressing-styles, hair, accessories, gestures and the like, but the manner is a lot more innocent. Just a bunch of growing-up girls looking up to pretty ladies they'd want to be like. A lot girly, that is, however. A lot, even for my imagination.
   
7. Girls and their sense of humor at play. Contrary to popular belief, girls do have a sense of humor. And a way simpler and non-cheesy one at that. Unlike boys who seem to survive on jokes derived from the "bent" angle of their minds, girls can have a hearty laugh at: a couple of them imitating teachers and their ways, poking fun at each other's habits, sharing jokes and encounters with stupid people (guys) and so on. Not that all of them are funny, no. But many are; and the rest, can well appreciate the funny ones.
   As a last message on this, to all the guys who dare say that girls lack good sense of humor, it takes one an appropriate sense of humor to appreciate another's. You can today smirk at your being funny, most probably because a girl told you that. Roger that?
   
8. They're funny creatures. :D Now this is not about their sense of humor, but girls, in general, are quite funny. Again, owing to the "variety" factor I guess. So you have all of them bundled up together in one crazy place: the blondes (dim-witted beauties), the pinkies (the ones with an addictive fetish for pink butterfly hair-clips, pink bags, pink watches and so on), the stinkies (yes, there are girls who stink real bad), the cool-ies (those cool-dudes of sorts: sleeves rolled up, abusive language, untied shoelaces ..basically with a way of dressing defying the very purpose of a school-uniform), the tomboys, the "mis-oriented" ones (you get the pun, don't you? I'd call them classic cases of some psychological identity-crisis and nothing else. Perhaps one downside of single-gender-education), the fighters, the back-biters, the jokers, the aunties, the nerds, the fashion-police (only girls can boast of knowing this weird art of inspecting uniform-clad people from the "fashion angle", or turning the whole uniform into something more "trendy". Although I, may I tell, have never been a fan of this skill) and finally, we have the smarties (those enviable pieces that smell of perfection) and so on ...it's crazy, really.
   There is a wannabe inside every single human being, and possibly a bigger one in girls—all girls. It is when one of them goes berserk with it, that the others get a chance to giggle at them. Having said that, there's no denying that there are some guys and girls who just cannot get over their attention-seeking instinct of theirs, at any point of time.
   
9. Order order. Even though girls nowadays could put their previous generations to shame, given their fearless approach that shouts more of feminism than plain "fight-for-our-rights" confidence, there is bound to be a lot more discipline in a school where there are only girls, than one where there are boys too. Thus, it is less likely—in a girls' school, may I add—to be left astounded at the noise of a sudden bomb-explosion in the classroom when Diwali's around; less likely for teachers to be backfired with rude and impolite answers from a student who doesn't study or complete her homework; less likely for a classroom to witness chalk-pieces and paper-balls floating in thin air or students skidding on the floor. Mind it, I only say "less likely" and not "impossible".
   Since we had our own moments of "dare-devilry" in school, you know. The whole class being sent to the principal's office for making a hell lot of noise in a free period or a bunch of students being meted out the classic punishment of standing in the corridor all day, head-down with shame, for littering the ground too bad, in a bid to celebrate a birthday or the last day of exams. Our own class once had it from the teacher, for spilling Pepsi all over the floor. We were trying to act smart and older than we were. As a result, we were put to cleaning the floors ourselves.
   All in all, girls do try such stunts at times. Maybe just to act older and bolder than they are, or to get a hang of something different, something risky, for that matter. But the best thing about them is that they won't, usually, repeat a mistake they last got scolded or punished for. They obey their elders. Yes, they really do. 
10. And as I strike the last point for this post, I reckon, there's a lot more that can be told. But to sum it up all, I'd say, there are good girls and there are not-so-good girls. Upto school, they are in their making; after college, they become who they want the world to see.
    But whatever may be the case, for almost every girl, there's no alternate for a good girl-friend. The worst thing about us girls is that we get into envying one-another way too easily and way too much. Having said that, she may bond well with guys, but sooner or later, every girl is gonna need a female shoulder to cry upon, or for support. Because the emotional, psychological and instinctive constructs of a man and a woman can never match.

Cheers to girlhood. Cheers to the ten years of life with my Alma mater, Holy Child Sr. Sec. School. :-)


P.S: Wow, did that just show how good a man-free world might be? Let me know through the comments. 

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